Let's talk about therapy!

June 11, 2013


Believe it or not, there are things I don't share on this blog. You will not find me writing about home decorating, my eyebrows, family, challenging clients, art I dislike, chia seeds, or that argument I had with my husband. My aim is to keep it helpful in this space-- which sometimes means being vulnerable and bringing forward details of my life.

All of that to lead up to: I really want to write about therapy. No, not the details of my own therapy sessions (I'll save you from that), but the importance of it. I want to make a gigantic trumpeted pronouncement: 

If you are feeling stuck, sad, habitually angry, insecure, or otherwise unhappy, please don't be afraid to ask for help! 
You don't need to figure it all out on your own. 

There are two things that have caused me to really focus my energy on dealing with my emotional baggage and mental health:

#1. Working with creative clients: Many of the artistic/creative people I've interviewed, met at a Small Art, worked with one-on-one, or casually chatted about creativity with have mentioned some degree of stuck-ness or insecurity or fear that's messing with their ability to get their important sh*t done. Often when working with these people I've felt like shaking them and saying HEY YOU! Do you know how awesome and talented you are? Do you know how much the world needs more of what you do? Having this conversation with people has made me want to take a taste of my own medicine. How can you advise a client to be less insecure when you're carrying around your own hesitance and attitude of playing it small? Um, you can't. My hope is that by dealing with my own stuck-ness, I can inspire others to address theirs.

#2. Wanting to make a lot of things happen: In addition to wanting to help creative people see their own genius, grow a business, make small dances, and host monthly resource brunches, I want to make a lot of things happen. When you're constantly doubting yourself, you move slowly. Really slowly. Insecurity and perfectionism are time sucks that should be kicked to the curb. In fact, I was finding it almost impossible to jump into our business work with this kind of insecurity, because running a business necessitates vulnerability-- and lots of it.

It was hard for me to decide to take action and find a therapist. 

Here's a sampling of what went through my head:
BUT I'M SO FUNCTIONAL! I'm not a wreck at all!
Therapy is a first-world privilege! I don't deserve it.
BUT I DON'T HAVE MENTAL HEALTH COVERAGE-- there are so many other things my money should be going towards!
I'll never find a therapist that GETS me!

Despite all of my doubts, I finally started the search for a therapist in January. It took some time to find the right person (the tough love kind, not the pat-you-on-the-back kind), but it was worth it in the end.

All of this to say: therapy has been the best money, time, and energy I've spent as an adult. Am I saying that everyone needs therapy? No. But I am saying that if you find yourself following your tail in a circle, or feeling bogged down by fear, insecurity, anger, or sadness, it's worth unpacking your fabulous baggage and having a look. It's really not that scary, and the benefits are huge: your relationships will be so much stronger, your kids will thank you, and your creative and business endeavors will have more ease. I insist that if you tend to your sh*t, only good things can come of it.

And that's the end of today's preaching.

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